I'm coming back to you again
On the floor for you again
You haven't heard from me in monthsi go back and forth believing. it scares me to imagine you're real and it scares me to imagine you're not.
And might be disappointed
I need myself on your wandering mind or I'll be exploited save me. i can't be okay without your help

Why did you send him?Boy
What will I learn?
What is the lesson?
A way back to you?did you make him so unreal because you want me to realize how bad a life without you is?
He's leading me down the big path with the bigger sun
The other is narrow and built for one
On my knees for you again
I'm coming back to you again
You haven't heard from me in months And might be disappointed
I need myself on your wandering mind or I'll be exploited

Why did you send him?
What will I learn?
What is the lesson?
A way back to you?
He's leading me down the big path with the bigger sun
The other is narrow and built for one
On my knees for you again
I'm coming back to you again

Battle my aches now
Then give me some time off to heal themjust give me a break.
And a body wrapped in paper, decorated naturegive me a new body in wrapping paper as a gift
Somewhere in Eden
Can you forgive me?
For I have the soul of an old lying beggar with a brain made of golda brain made of gold... imagine that. it would be so valuable, sure, but overall useless. people would ooh and ahh then go about their day because what else can they do?
Can I be restored?
Maybe my story is over, but I'm not prepared to touch itmy epilogue. my life is over, i'm just living the ending
Should we laminate it?trying to drag it out as long as possible so i don't have to accept it's over

Battle my ships now
Be the completion I neededBattleShip. be my partner
And a shoulder to whine on, miracles to sigh on
That's why I pleaded
Don't yet mistreat me; I am not ready
Haunt my existence; The plank is too heavymatthew 7:3-5

Where will we go? Can you tell me first?where will i go when i die?
I thought we were tighter, and this just hurtsi thought we were closer than this. close enough for you not to keep things from me
Where will we land? Will I see you again?
Maybe on a train somewhere inside my headtrain of thought
Yes, I know the truth, and so do their friends
Whoever they meet, it'll come to an end
Hard not to battle, when words only rattleit is difficult to hold my tongue
Easy to mistake abandoning and escape some get upset because they think someone is abandoning them, but it doesn't even cross their mind that the other person was miserable, and may feel like this is right for them
Sit on the mantle, but what have you done?
Can you try to handle all this at once?what did you do to deserve a place on the mantle? i'm the one who has to go through all this
I don't mean to doubt you
It's not a challenge
But you said you carried me when I saw you standingyou didn't carry me, you made me walk on my own while you stood by and watched

No one seems to have the answer
Did one of you drop it in a confidential pocket?
No one seems to know I listen
Did you forget to tell them I'd be here?i think i'm actually invisible. does anyone notice at all
Otherwise what's happening?
No one seems to fear your upcoming
Was it all a waste?
Did I suffer just to break again?
Did I suffer just to break again?

Can you forgive me?
For I have the heart of a witch in her prime
And she'll tear you apart while her minions watch
Maybe his winter is colder, but I wasn't told I'd fight itsorry, i didn't know i was competing in a catastrophe contest
Should we eliminate it?

Drown me in waters so blue I can cure themblue=sad
Pour out a bottle of silicate lava
I have my sword in the opposite hand
I will not brawl, but I know that I can
Struggling is pointless inside your quicksand
If I may be honest, I don't think I'll ever understand

Can you forgive me?
For I have the hands of a clock with a curse by a damaged mandoomed from the start
Was this your plan?
Maybe the game is still running, but I can't decide on a playerthere are too many versions of myself i don't know who i really am
Should we rig it?

Battle my fakes now
Then give me some time off to cheer them
And a body wrapped in paper, decorated nature
Somewhere in Eden

Don't you hate me by now?
I dream it true
The worst part is I know it's impossible for you
So you're saying it's all in my head?
I'm the selfish belittled failure
But you're all I have now
And you let me down

I can't
I can't do this againi feel like i'm writing the same thing over and over, arguing back and forth with you and it takes up so much energy
Didn't you hear me before?
I cannot do anything anymore
I can't
No, I can't do this again
You've got my heart in your hands
And you're staring at me like you're King

They told me I'd face God
But tell me, what were the odds
We'd be going head to head in a fight to the death
You're a fraud
There's nowhere left to hide
I thought you would be on my side
They didn't mention staring me down just so I would know you're the King

Don't you eat me by now?
You've already skinned meyou stripped me to my necessities. what's next? isn't it time to kill me? what else could you possibly have to do with me? (Ref. Great Death)
I'm just the seed of a bright peeled lychee
And it's on me
So you're saying it's all up to me?
I'm the self-righteous hermit
And you're all I have now
But you let me down

I can't
I can't do this again
Didn't you hear me before?
I cannot do anything anymore
I can't
No, I can't do this again
You've got my heart in your hands and you're staring at me like you're King

They told me I'd face God
Oh, they'll never believe me
What are the odds we'd be going head to head in a fight to the death?
You're a fraud
There's nowhere left to hide
I thought you would be on my side
They didn't mention staring me down just so I would know you're the King
They told me I'd need weapons
But once they break, they're worthless
Who guessed we'd be going head to head in a duel to the death
You're the fraud
There's nowhere we can hide
I thought you would be on my side
They didn't mention staring me down just so I could know you're the King

Why would you consider me?why'd it have to be me?
I am nothing but a girl in your imaginary world
I saw the cameras and your friends hiding behind the miraclescameras for watching me. you hide behind "good deeds". miracles
How about you let me go?
How could I not resent you when
You desensitize me to your tricks so low?
And it's magical until I find out they might be believably fauxquestioning your miracles again
Why won't you let me go?

It's only fair if you beware
I'm not good anymore when I should be remorsefuland it's your fault
The globe is square
I know that's rare, but I have seen it with my eyes
Yet no one uncovers my disguiseit's frustrating. you won't allow anyone to hear me, ensuring i stay deep in this pit
There's got to be a reason you chose me to believe in
I'm just your demonstration
You don't tend to me

Why would you lay waste to me?
I was fine before your plans included
Me being abandoned by the comfort of ignorance
And a pillow of innocence
When will you let me go?
How could I ever trust you again
When I feel the bars in this cage wrap around my hands?
Is it the other way around?
If I'm erratic then I can't feel it
I'm starting to think you won't let me go

So I'm the heir, huh?
Well, I've noneno air to spare
I've no evil to forswear
My lies: feeble. But do you care?it doesn't matter what i say or if i lie, you'll do whatever you want anyway
I should be grateful, they say
But you're why I'm so hateful
I have bones fullfull of hate
Satan was an angel
But they treat her like she should be shamefulhow can you be a being of love if your followers are so full of hate? they judge everything, everyone, all the time. they turn on things so fast.

Tell me, what's it like to be so holy?
The characters think you're unmarred
Yet you're the only one who can sin without facing judgment
Tell me, what's it like to be so sacred?
The characters think it odd, but we're meant to be naked
I never sin without facing judgment

A fiery trial in the distance
Have I not already endured it?more pain is to come? it gets worse? i thought i was at my lowest already
And so was that just practice
For what I'm now sure will kill me, honest?

Enimga, do you feel me right now?
Of all the monsters you spit out and control then judge the doom you made for them,every thuman you create, plan the life of, and send to heaven or hell that YOU PREDETERMINED
Who's your favorite? Isn't it me?
If you are lying, I must confess I strapped a gun to my heart, and I'll shoot itif you made me go through all this and i'm not even your favorite, that makes it a million times worse
Are you startled I just do as you say? I'm your follower
And I will obey as you say blindly in proverbs

Enigma, how do I know for sure?
Of all the entities, enemies, and ecstasy I will withstand, which are banned?what are the rules i must follow?
I am hollow; No, you made me this way and I'll wallow
It just seems cruel you would curse me with rules and a fuel I need but can't havesame-sex attraction

And you can holler if you want me to answer
You owe me nothing, but please advance her
Oh, it's out of your power? Oh, my God, you're a liar!

Enigma, I cannot do this much longer
A spirit leapt into me and it crept and slept where I can't see
It eats me
I am fragments of what I used to be
It took minutes

I am flattered I'm who you chose to have hurt
But if I'm this weak I may as well give up as there is no choice for a run-on

I'll be by myself for years in hell with you
Will you hold my hand or just my brand if that's true?
When they lower meinto the ground their faces say it all
Oh, I knew they wouldn't bat eyes after the brawl i knew they wouldn't still love me. you liars.

Would you believe me if I finally admit you were right?i spent forever learning you are the bad guy. turns out you were right about God all along. He is just trying to deceive me.
He's a traitor, a hypocrite baiter
He washes my brain with lighthe brainwashed me

When we meet, will I get to be myself?my terrible, terrible self
Man, his sick game has tricked me again
He's not my friend
When we converse, will I now get to act like myself?
Simulation conned me again
He's not my friend
He's not my friend
He's not my friend

I'll be by myself for years in Hell with you
We could acquaint all night and we might as well if that's truewe might as well become close. two supposedly evil souls now spending eternity together. we will be evil together
When I'm on my own, the grave called home...
they cease to exist only in my rotting fist, I squeeze
Would you believe me if I say you were right all along?
He's a leaver, a master deceiver
He dissects my brain with tongswhy is he not trying to be more careful?

When we meet, will I get to be myself?
His experiment has tricked me again
He's not my friend
When we converse, will I now get to act like myself?
Simulation made me feel
It seemed so real
I thought it was real

I'll be by myself for years on earth with themliving out my final years before i sacrifice myself
This was all I was made for: trials for The End
When they lower me, I want to see their facesi want to see their reactions to what i've done
At least virtual reality. Let me hear their phrases

When we meet, will I understand myself?
When we meet, I can't wait to free myself
When I'm free, I can't wait to meet myself
Man, his sick game has tricked me again
He's not my friend
I don't know why he says he's my friend
Don't know why he still says he's my friend
Simulation made me deal
It felt so real
It feels so real
I thought it was real.

Don't make me wait
I know you try to explain my
looming fate
This is not fair and you are aware

I can see you're hard to please
Now I know you have no hearthow could something with a heart do something this cruel?
I defend your silhouetteeven when no one else does. even in the dark.
Even in the dark

What is it now?
You're in the closet making noisesyou're the monster in my closet
And I am drowned by a stray cur
My own neighborhurt by people close to me. stung by my own companion

I can see you made them this way
Now I know you have no brainhow can you create something authentic that you have no experience in yourself?
I complain and you remainyou continue to take pride in me as i yell at you and doubt you
Even in the dark

You live to judge
I am so stumped
Why shouldn't I succumb?what's there to fight for? why shouldn't i just give up?
You live to rule
You're a liar
Don't dodge the gunfire

What is it now? You walk out
Now I know I have no doubt
Can't you see?
You are choking me even in the dark
And you rend my silhouette
Even in the dark

Even in the dark

I'm a God chaseri follow you and only you
If you let me I would save heri wish to the characters i admire that they will be safe but that will never be
I say "I'd heal you if I had the strength to"
They're all bad liars
They want my head, sirei know they're all conspiring against me
I will never surrender to my neighbor
'Cause I'm a God chaser

How do you justify this cycle to your disciples?or do they enjoy being cruel as well?
When did you come up with this Bible in a wave so tidal?when were you able to find peace long enough to write it?
Nothing compares to this affair of despair
It doesn't feel fair I can prepare for the chairhow do you know i'm doing it for the right reason? does that even matter to you?

But I hold so dear your word in my ear
This sphere with you as the puppeteer is top tieri love and admire your work, i just wish i wasn't the center of it
I hold so close your voice in my home
Their clothed molds will decompose so slowpeople i will stretch out the deaths of

I'm a God chaser
If you let me I would save her
I say "I'd heal you if I had the means to"
They don't respect you, sire
If you asked me I'd breathe fire
I will never surrender to my neighbor
'Cause I'm a God chaser

Why do you justify this trial? It only made me spiral
Where did you come up with this Bible? What an idle titleit literally means THE BOOK. you couldn't have been a bit more creative?
Nothing compares to this cruel scare when I'm in prayerbad things happening still while i follow you
I know it's not fair I wasted time when I was unawarei would've had more time to plan, and i wouldn't have done certain things i am paying for now

But I keep so close your Word in my throat
Though this globe with you as the bones is so cold
You rule in this blue and I am homeschooled
It's so cruel but now I respect you

I can feel it all
They will feel it all
You will be so proud of mei figured out what you want me to do
I can take the eyes and they'll realize
They shouldn't be so loud near me
I can take a stand and better yet,
I am found, I am foundyou found me!

I'm a God, I'm a God chaser
I'm a God, I'm a God chaser
There's a God
They're all near fakers even if I saved her
They'll never respect you, sire
If you asked me, I'd light them on fire
I will never surrender to my neighbor
'Cause I'm a God chaser
I'm a God chaser
I'm a God chaser
I'm your God chaser

I watch them all doubt what I know to be true
Honestly, what fools! Do they know they're just sending me more proof?
In my walls, I feel screaming and scratching and beating
As they try to escape

Dear Lord,
There's something in the water, alright
In my line of sight
"I forgave him for the fright when I met God tonight
Now I can say that I've met my maker
He's right up there in the panel
And on TV they talk about my cager
Skip to the 435th channel"
I bet you're happy I am hostile
Love, your dearest apostle

I watch them all say words that just don't make sense
Honestly, what aches! How could they think I'd fall for it?
I am smarter than this
In my walls, I hear begging and pleading and beating
As they try to survive

Dear Lord,
There's something in the water, okay?
In my time of day
"I forgave him for the pain when I met God today
I can say there's a storn upcoming
They doubt what I've always known
And on TV they worship my betrayer
Skip to the 435th channel"
I bet you're happy I am awful
Love, your dearest apostle

Let's be honest, I'll save myself first
And I'd lead you to the grave
But let's be truthful I'd die before you
I have so little to give
And I won't ever forget

I can say that I've met my maker
See him up there in the panel?
I swear to him I am not a liar
Four three five in every fire
I know you're happy I am hostile
Love, your dearest apostle
I know you're happy I am awful
Love, your only apostle

I wonder how long it takes
To pick from all the traits you made
Can I see the board at least?prologue
I am fascinated at your feet

Some may say they're innocents and sorry
If that were true I wouldn't have to write this story
No one left to witness now
My destruction that takes them on a ride

Now I'm a pieces
I am your puzzle
You break my heart every time you redo me
I can't admit it
They'll think I'm crazy
You break my heart 'cause you don't even need me

Some may claim they're innocents and worthy
If that were true I wouldn't haev to waste this story
On my knees, you're watching me
And you shake me and take me and make me say

Amen
I'll never feel more than dead
Amen
Don't put me on the list of books you've read

I am just lines now
I am your notebook
You break my heart every time you read me
I can't admit it
They'll think I'm crazy
You break my heart 'cause you don't even need me

I wonder what made you think of this
Were there hundreds of failed attempts to fake it?
One by one you place me altogether
Just to rip me apart again

'Cause I'm in pieces
I am a puzzle
You break my heart every time you redo me
I won't admit it
I am not crazy
You break my heart 'cause I know you can replace me

Now I'm in pieces
I'm still in pieces

Something made you choose me
What is it?
I've got to know
Nothing could ever move me
You made me
I owe you my soul

I needed a father
So I ducked for cover
But you'll give me all I please

All my attention lies on you, Father
Read my mind, read my plan
All my abrasions come from down under
I'll take the fine but I'll never crack
I won't crack

Ever after sailed highi had potential to heal before this happened
When I guessed it was a test
Reaching in my dressesvery literal lyric - i just like wearing dresses and i liked how it sounded.
The unveiling will never meet rest

Who's really conned
When they fight and they fawn?trying to cope by saying the characters are really the ones who are conned because they care about meaningless things
They think they're real
But I'll never let on

There goes the mother
Failing to love her
On and on, on and on

All my attention lies on you, Father
Read my crime, read my hand
All my infections come from down under
I'll take the fine but I'll never crack
I won't crack

If I say I don't receive you,
Know that I'm lying to protectlying and denying that i hear you
You still say "I won't deceive you"
What do you call this, then?there's no other way to interpret it
You tell me to tap it three times
As my foot flows in circles
And I step over every line
You tell me to knock it off, knock it off, knock it off
But I can't read your mindgosh. you're practically torturing me

All my attention? To drown you in, Father
Peep my shrine on the stand
Now and forever, lead me somewhere
I'll drink your blood, eat your handcommunion
If they keep begging with their eyes pretending
They take the bet to get me to crack
I'll take the fine but I'll never crack
I will take the fine but I'll never crack
I might crackno promises

I am but a poor one but I have infinite lives
I have a plan in pocket but I can't say I'll survive
I'm still in your grasp and I can't get out
I definitely can't admit it now

What will they say?
Will they be hurt? Afraid?
I would be lying if I say this will ever be changed
I'm still in your arms and I can't get out
I definitely can't deny it now

I'm frozen, falling
Though this is my calling
Why does it have to be this way?i'll follow through but reluctantly
Every single day I climb higher
You knock me off of this tower
Yet I am still afraid

What else can I say about
The one you love, the one you
Doubt me, why don't you?
Why don't you
What else can I say about
The one who gave me nightmares?
Out of everyone I need
You're the only one who breathes

I am just a sheep who wants to frolic in the grass
How could you do this to someone who was so innocent?
I'm still in your palm and I can't get out
I definitely can't ignore it now

What will they say?
Will they be fine? In pain?
I would be cruel if I said I know I can change
I'm still in your home and I can't get out
I definitely can't escape it now

I am open, stalling
And I find it calming I can talk to you anywhere
Every single stare, I sink deeper
You give your time to this creature
Yet I am not alive

What else can I say about
The one they love, the one they doubt?
Flee, why don't I? Why don't I?
What else can I say about
The one who gave me nightmares?
Out of everyone I need
You're the only one

What do I have to be sorry about?
Saving her life? Ridding the drought?vigilante...
Tried everything they wanted me to be
But they didn't want me

I could talk for hours and you hear only my voice
I try in real life under a minute and I losei'm always interrupted
I dissolve in every drink I consume
I never bloom because they don't give me a chanceif you only gave me the resources. you don't know how much potential i have
Even in my own bedroom

It's a waste of time to care
When you are the only one who reads the news
It's a waste of space, the things I say
'Cause they don't know what they don't know anyway

I try to ignore you
But you are the only one who doesn't to me
And I do lie for you
But what does it mean if I can't sleep?

I would be the only one in this building
If they took away the liars
Why don't you do the things you wanna do?
You're scared of dying?
It's happening! There's no use denying
Why don't you say the things you wanna say?
You're scared they won't want you?
Already no one likes you

I try to ignore you
But you are the only one who doesn't to me
And if I do lie for you
What does it mean if I can't eat?

It's a waste of time to speak at all
To them, I'm just a transparent piece of fog
All I do is take up the space in places
That would better be someone else's face

I try to hate you
But you're the only that can read my mind
And I die every time I realize
I'll never be the only, the only, the only, the onlyyou're all i have but i'm just replaceable to you.

See me, feel me, hear me, heal me
Every day, voices say you're knocking at my door
When I open, to my knees saying
"What was all this for?"
I can't fake it and it's too late to change it

Listen to my vision
It's a glistening prison
Every day my brain claims I'll never be the same
How can I when everything was admitted as a game?
Listen: I am not well
I'm a bedazzled jail cell

I am not my situation
I'm the knight of my vocation
When you know my true motivation
You can unpack my future destination

Touch me, love me, hug me, walk right through me
Every day the pain claims it could've been avoided
If I knew I was being used I wouldn't be exploited
It's getting harder to fake it, but it's way too late to fix it

I am not my situation
I'm the knight of my vocation
When you know my true motivation
You can unpack my future destination
I won't crack, give you information
I'm not a fan of confrontation
Never-ending interrogation
Ineffective representation

Can you show me identification?
Give me a hand with my investigation
All this hate, the radiation
You have no consideration

Every day my brain claims I'll never be the same
How can I when everything was admitted as a game?

Listen to my vision
I'm a glistening prison

Do I supply everything you need?
Was I all you dreamed of when you made me?
Am I doing a good job saving the world?
I've always wanted to break that curse

I hear you more
And they all doubt but I am so sure
They don't understand
I don't even feel real
Not a person, just a thought
In a box, so small

I am supplied everything I need
Food, water, shelter, and my love of the week
I can, will, do anything to please you
But why me? I just have to ask you

I hear you more
And they all doubt but I am so sure
They don't understand
I don't even feel
Not a person, just a mop
In a box, so small

I hear you all the time
And they all doubt, but I pay no mind
They still don't understand
Don't expect it, never did
'Cause that's a way out

They still don't understand
I don't even feel here
Not a person, just a cot
In a box, so small

Fate is what brought me to you
You chose me from the shelf next to the nuts and fruit
How is it plausible I'm responsible for these obstacles?
You made it possible
I can't talk the talk, I can't walk the walk
When I exercise, I trip on sidewalk chalk
I can't be honest, can't be anything
When I can feel, it's feeling like dying

Life of a kernel
Cook me, trap me
Please do not dare burn my body
It hurts too much in this box
Life of a kernel
Pop me, shake me
Open me and eat my body
'Cause that's all I was made to be
Life of a kernel, baby

Cope is what brought me to your bed
I need answers now and all you give me is bread
How is it possible I'm responsible for these follicles?
You made them plausible
I can't fight the fight, I can't make it right
When I terrorize, I recognize the plight

Life of a kernel
Cook me, trap me
Please do not dare burn my body
It hurts too much in this box
Life of a kernel
Pop me, shake me
Open me and eat my body
'Cause that's all I was made to be
Life of a kernel

Life of a kernel
Even though you eat my friends and swallow them whole,
I still want to be in your pocket
Waiting for the day I get locked in
Life of a kernel

Life of a kernel
Take me in bulk
Then put me away in the cabinet to waste
It's way too dark in this box
Life of a kernel
Share me with all your culpable people
Life of a kernel
Life of a kernel
Life of a crying kernel
Life of a kernel