genetics
(9.20.21)

i am cold and you are the sun
heat from genetics and subjectiveness, you've won
loathing the way you think it's okay to look at me
when i look within and you can't even see

abusive
(10.19.21)

your stare is abusive and your hands are fire
my face cracked from grinning through the night
fear creeps its way in when my screen says your name
but my heart is outside my body

colorblind
(10.22.21)

I'll acknowledge myself if you won't do it for me
Carrying the weight of us on my back
Feelings I've been fighting life to find
You are red and I'm colorblind
I swore away all the parts of myself
Parts I thought I would never take back
I do take pity on those of his kind
But what else to live for if you are not blind?

acrophobia
(12.5.21)

You do not like heights
But I just want you to fall
Would you dare, for me?

betray me, tongue
(12.9.22)

my tongue is a traitor, it spills without saying
my waiting is a weapon you stay underestimating
my act is apt; it's only a matter of time
till i break loose and you get tired of mine

your stare is sick, and it makes me weak
as does walking with you and hearing you speak
dream of me and i am yours to keep
i want nothing more than to steal your sleep

star the moon
(1.3.22)

I lie so still as my dreams begin to shake
It seems as if I'm in one, though I know I'm awake
and I could tell you right now, everything i'm thinking
How just one look from you leaves my heart sinking

You bring to life every room that you're in
And you dragged me out, body dripping in sin
I am not there when blinded by truth
He treats me well but he's not you

I could tell you that I grieve every second you're gone
and I could tell you I hate you but I would be wrong
you want honest? I just want to be yours
it's long overdue and I don't care anymore

How was I meant to know it would go this far?
I'm every moon and you're every star
I melt to liquid when your lips speak my shape
the Longing is too nice to even dare to escape
But if I did, would you say it was far too soon?
You're every star and I'm every moon
I would stop time forever to stare at your face
Tell me your heart's rules; what sets it ablaze?

being mine
(1.4+5.22)

i feel the words you're writing to me
in my gut and my brain and my heart
send more my way, i want you to stay
if you wanted we would never be apart

calm the voices in my head
make me bleed with just your presence
tell me that you're crazy, but it's fine
sleep when i can see your face
this must be how golden tastes
tell me how it feels to be called mine

i feel the glances you're sending me
in my legs and my chest and my heart
linger a moment, break me open
at least try to look the part

calm the nerves that keep me there
you don't breathe, it's so unfair
tell me you're crazy, that it's fine
sleep when i can see your face
this must be how loving tastes
tell me what you think of being mind

i feel the weight you take off of me
nowhere to be seen or hidden
your calming demeanor, my neverending fever
read the stories that were already written

sleep when i can see your face
this must be how longing tastes
tell me: do you want to be called mine?

sinking urge
(1.5.22)

i have this sinking urge to ask
i'm curious, trying now to give in
what about me that looks at you like that?
what about me that gets you going?

but i type yet words don't seem to care
only a person with a brain
would notice a heart turning a square

when will i be loved? i pray
that this isn't what i assume
pieces threaten to fall in darkened grey
the flowers almost die instead of bloom

my sinning evenings, faithful brights
hopeless unchanging communication
what is it that makes you hungry?
what changes in the night?

i pause and almost tell you things i never have
should've expected i'd be disappointed so soon
i know you know that i know you want more
just days in i'm a record breaking fool

I don't want you to touch me
(1.5-8.22)

I don't want you to touch me
just stare like you still wish I was yours
I don't want you to want me
but please let me want you

I don't want your sick compliments
just tell me I look pretty if I do
I don't want you to want me
but please let me want you

I don't want your repeated questions
your worst fear has come true
I don't want you to touch me
but please let me want you

I don't want your camera shaking
labels do not mean yes
I don't want you to want me
but please let me want you

I don't want your confessions
let us be together like the day
can't you just want me as innocently
as wishing you were looking at my face?

I don't want you to touch me
just tell me you'll ease all my blue
I don't want you to want me
but I can't deny wanting you

into
(1.8.22)

Wish you could see me
Wish you could be me
Wish you would try for me
Wish that was enough for me
What are you into?
The way I stare you down?
I think I need you.
Don't shut me out
All I want to do is show you I care
I pray there is more than what I see there

language
(1.10.22)

you speak a different language, don't you?
don't you agree?

i've been taking lessons in all the different things you say
but you're content with misunderstanding my time of day
tell me anything, i mean it, anything.
say i'm selfish and rude, make me regret i looked at you
say i'm desperate for a glance, make me wish i never went
tell me i said something else than what i actually meant
secrecy is nice until you don't even know it yourself
don't you know it?
don't you agree?

vine
(1.10.22)

it was all just fine till a Vine did grow
"i don't have time but what's the harm in longing to know?"
one mistake turned many and now the Vine fights to stand
covered in sap
all my feelings could fit in your static brain
but they spill out the corner and you don't try to contain
the Vine grew and flew around the brick walls standing
every sharp prick a mortifying landing

dueling for dominance, something i wish
green but rotting, this Vine hates bliss
healing the ivy, lingering kiss
"tell me what to do to be something you miss"

the Vine turned golden with no room to try
curling around every tree and every single goodbye
cut them down, take them out, be careful in lumber
disturb me a million times in my slumber
dueling for feeling, something i wanted
green but dying, did i take bliss for granted?
healing your ivy, a hesitant kiss
i'll do whatever it takes to be something you miss
desperate dueling for anything, misty mourning for some
is this honestly, truly, the way that you love?
healing my ivy, the Vine bathes in bliss
i'd have done whatever it takes to be something you missed

i still would do everything to be something you miss

CAN'T YOU SEE?
(1.16.22)

We were riding far along enough to know each other's names
You breathed in the heavy air and I breathed in the pain
Your mind was on a song to choose and mine was still on you
I stare when you weren't looking and it left me overdue

Can't you see, through every goodbye
I could sit by the window watching paint dry?
Lying on my bedroom floor, waiting for time to die
Can't you see, through every hello
Could you scream me into space just to never let me go?
Holding back the things you think I won't want to know
Is that enough for you? Is that enough?

Young and dumb, not much has changed
And we didn't know much better
I still flash back to the very first time
You ever lent me your sweater
You looked me in the eyes and your stare left a bruise
As I understood, finally, I had something to lose

September left us achine, so I hate it brought me you
Because October should've been healing but it couldn't be with you
November drove me off a cliff, I thoguht I'd be alone
But December was my recurring dream, and I won't let you go

Can't you see, through every goodbye
I could linger in the air, drawing pictures in the sky
Dying on my bedroom floor, waiting for time to lie
Can't you see, through every hello
I will scream you into space but I'll never let you go
I can build a fire while you tell me what made you so cold

Is that enough for you? It's not enough

walking
(1.19.22 S-P)

We're walking
So far gone
I've got a whole script in my head and I'm messing with my hands
And the path curves
You look at me with a grin
And I'm melting
What'd I want to say again?

You cannot possibly understand what they do to me
I know I shouldn't be the type to get to worked up
But I can't help but wonder
Why you still want her

Oh, I wonder how you feel
And I wonder what you see
Oh, I wonder what it means
When you look at her, do you think of me?
Oh, no

We're walking
So far gone
My mouth is spilling everything I thought I could keep in
And you turn
And look at me with a grin
I'm frozen
What was I saying again?

You can't possibly understand what this does to me
I know I should keep alm
But I can't help but wonder
Why do you still lust for her?

Oh, I wonder how you feel
And I wonder what you see
Oh, I wonder, what does it mean?
When you look at her, do you think of me?
Oh, I wonder what you need
Less than labels and jealousy
Oh, I wonder, do you care
Like you do her?

Oh, I wonder how you feel
Would you tell me what you see?
Oh, I wonder what it means
When you look at her, do you think of me?

over my dead body
(1.20.22)

over my dead body will you ever leave
you'll be gone too and i promise
i will be vain in the time that remains
trying not to spend your honor

how does your hair fall so effortlessly?
and how do you fall, my prince?
the way that you look will never be enough
when you come close i flinch

you're my favorite song with the catchiest chorus
i could listen to you on repeat for hours
that list you write, did i make the cut?
am i the only one in your tower?

over my dead body will you ever leave
you'll be gone too if i'm honest
i will be vain in the time that remains
trying not to take your promise

girls who get you off
(1.20.22)

maybe you just don't like me enough
maybe you're afraid to be alone
maybe you felt pity when you saw my reply
and you decided to make that your home

maybe you'll consider disappearing
maybe you will for a while
maybe when you're ready, when it's convenient for you,
you'll come back with your feelings in a pile

maybe you really don't think i'm pretty
maybe there are too many flaws
maybe i shouldn't have to ask you not to chase in lust
for girls who get you off

canvas heart
(1.21.22)

painted my heart your favorite colors so you'd want it
they know it'd happen and get prepared for the show
heedless then and now, deceiving words: false and faux
were they nothing more than illusory skit?
is it just something that is too out of reach?
the words you spoke, were they figures of speech?
after all of our days, some sweet but seeming counterfeit,
i never can seem to say i didn't think you'd stoop so low
always looking for the absolute best in you, though
yet i'm not sure there's very much "best" in our midst
it was clear, it was innocent, then you stained the glass
taking every missing piece of the picture with
then i had nothing but the way it was left, in ruins
and the stabbing memory of a fading past
the kinder words you said fading into the abyss
praying i'll someday have the strength to lose it

space
(1.21.22)

i know you want it, space
but you can destroy mine
i want nothing between us and nothing but you
no flesh or fabric, no words or air
not even the world could attempt to compare
my hand in yours, your speech on mine
free my calm and cloud my mind
become one in me and i in you
not even the world, for me, would do
pink turns into blue and black
and you'll choose me over a heart attack
human nature to beg and plead
for anything other than poverty
enjoy it while it lasts, faithful beast
show you the path that leads northeast
ignore my voice and battle my cries
not even the world could dry my eyes

negative, positive
(1.24.22)

negative, positive
here, there
passive, active
question, statement
hungry, full
leave, stay
addition, deletion
ugly, pretty
hurry, patient
apathy, empathy
stop, go
kind, rude
young, old
hot, cold
shy, bold
fire, water
up, down
loose, tight
left, right
joy, sad
trapped, free
you, me

open my door
(1.24.22)

could you ever need me the way i need you?
all that i've ever even wanted was for someone to
i think i've needed you, but didn't know
you've truly infected me, i can't help but let it show

i don't want to be your only town
but leave me if i'm not your breakthrough now
why don't you treat me the way she does?
why don't you open my door?

they could stare at me alll day long
but before you even turn i'm already gone
i could wait and wait but what good would that go?
i am nothing lately but longing for you

i don't want to be your only town
but leave me if i'm not your breakthrough now
why don't you treat me the way that she does
why don't you open my door?

ransom
(1.24.22)

she told me she could tell i was starting to fall
and i know you notice but do you see at all?
because i'd like to take in every inch of your being
if you say you're not a thief, what's this heart you're stealing?

you kidnapped my reasons
i want it to be real
when i can't see you
how do you deal?
you kidnapped my sadness
but held it for ransom
when you're not with me
how can you deal?

she told me she could tell it was different this time
i wonder if you notice; do you think it's a crime?
because i'd like to love you, someday or never
if you swear that it's true, where are your endeavors?

you kidnapped my breath
i want it to be real
when you can't see me
how do you deal?
you kidnapped my standards
but held them for ransom
when i'm not with you
how can you deal?

you kidnapped my tears
i want so badly to be real
when i don't see you how do you deal?
you kidnapped my tears
i want too badly to be real
when you're not with me how dare you deal?

different worlds
(1.24.22)

and so it seems we've from different worlds
but you're only a boy and i'm just a girl
aren't i the one you told everyone about?
if you even did so, but i highly doubt

so it seems we're 2 different species
planets a million miles apart this evening
but keep me in your pocket, let me see nobody else
why do you not want me all to yourself?

surface
(1.24.22)

Would you have told me if I didn't ask?
I'm guessing not, as it came to pass
Any light against any surface
I beg my mind to please not curse it

Would you have told me if I didn't ask?
Or let you know lightly with a nudge or tap
I know they linger, and I know they exist
Spit it out and I won't feel like we have problems to fix

Overly dramatic, overthinking and such
Tell me when it comes to be too much

pleading
(1.26.22)

I'm pleading I Love You, can you listen for once?
No touch will solve this now
And you don't know how to tell me
Oh, what good that does us now

I'm pleading I'm Sorry, can you listen for once?
No touch will solve this now
And you don't know how to take a joke
What good that does me now

peppering sink
(1.27.22)

I miss you too much it hurts to move
Is it healthy I feel like I have something to prove?
Straighter hair, less clothes to wear
What parts are you afraid to lose?

See, I could spend a week in ice
But by the end, you should know, I wouldn't be nice
I left dents in the ground as I wept
I just want a peppering slice

Give me all you want to
I will gladly take it from you
ANd if I don't say thank you, something's wrong
I don't love you, but oh, I want to
& I don't need your pity

I want you too much it hurts too blink
Is it healthy it fogs my mind and refuses to let me think?
Needless to admit, drowning in your wit
I'm doubled over the peppering sink

incomplete
(2.2.22)

if i am everything you say i am, why do i incomplete you?
love must be a foreign word; is it me who can't take a clue?
only the young and fairly naive would want to see black and white
vow to please my faint desires, now promise it will be alright


ecstasy! i'm so deeply high on the way you make me feel
you're plenty beautiful, but my dear lover, i'm not even R E A L
oil painting your favorite sky - don't expect another
until i'm dead i'll be your friend, without you or together

sin
(2.6.22)

then, my favorite sin, the one to smile at me
everything in one, honey
you have me forever at your feet
you know it
you have me forever at your leisure
my favorite cure

car ride
(2.8.22)

there's never been a car ride more devastatingly short
quicker than a smack to the head
i almost said i would die for him
but i already feel dead

drafts
(2.9.22)

no one knows except the drafts i write
the thoughts that never become words
the dreams i have of holding them tight
and wondering if he feels heard

no one knows how dirty i feel
or the excuses i create in my head
how i'll cover his life with hands of steel
but refuse to lie in his bed

no one knows i tried to run away
for hope that something might change
my knees are tired but i'll never sway
though often, it's true, i feel estranged

no one knows my deepest fears
and he doesn't think to ask
if nobody tries my bluest tears
no one will know they're glass

no one cries quite like his gold
their love was my only friend
opposites attract but they also fold
so i'll hate until it's too late to bend

heartbeat
(2.10.22)

do you remember asking if i wanted you to light it?
did you notice what i tried to contain?
do you remember the faintest of tears in my eyes?
did it hurt you, seeing me in pain?
do you remember that night? do you really?
did you hold back what you were lusting for?
do you remember my silent begging for effort
as you were begging for more?
do you remember deleting that picture?
did it create a dream in your head?
do you remember, you were saying nothing?
did you catch what i said?
do you remember that moment in his car?
did you think i wanted you to say it?
do you remember being held by my terrified hands?
did you feel our heartbeat? i did

normal people
(2.11.22)

we do everything normal people do
except sex and conversations and fighting till we're through
you breathe flames at me and i all over you

every little hiccup makes me never you gone
how could i not be drown to something so irrefutably wrong?
i don't mind if it hurts you, know i'll kick out all my songs
and haunt you when you kill my soul, i'm finally moving on

don't be shocked, you must have known this would never ever last
i believe the world is more and you believe it's flat
twist me, do it, i'd rather die than have a spell be cast
forgive me, you are old and grey, but i'm once more in the past

we do everything normal people do
except sex and conversations and fighting till we're through
you will breathe your flame at me and i all over you

repitition
(2.15.22)

your repitition, prayer you write
the paper in my mouth exhaling ignites
i am worthy of whatever you deem
what about love and self esteem?
a ghostly story when our night ends
over and over my navy bends
heedless and high; i expect nothing more
than taking for granted what you claim to adore
every thought, i hide, and many are distractions
our hearts are in the palms of our sinful actions
under the pews of this abandoned church
we are both lost with no need to search
more, stop it, GO! my brain will burst
nothing to compare but it can't be the worst
the smoke around my legs one hand will ignite
your realization and your final pleading fight

Always Aching
(2.17.22)

I Am Always Aching for Anything
your Beating Brain in my Bed
a Curing Call when i'm Crying
or a Daring Date i Dread
Embrace my Embers Even in the End
Fight the Feeling of ungrateful
as your Headache Heals my Hand
my Impossible Ideals are Integrated
when Jokes leak Juice of Jail
my Key, my Knight, my Keeper
Let me Line you in Labels
i will Make you into Magic
you Need to be Nice or you'll be Nailed
Over and Over Onto the Oval Oddity
as i Peel you Pale of Pain
Quaking, your heart is in Quarantine
and Running is Radioactive
you're Scaring me, Sacrificing my Sculptor
Take it from me, i can Tell your Tactics
you are Undeserving to be Upstairs
my Vial Veers onto your Veins
When Will you Watch While i Whisper?
Yield Your Yeses for Yesterday

remorseful
(2.17.22)

were you remorseful
i had told you how i felt
but my declaration fell on your deaf ears
and i was crying when i turned
you didn't even know
i was transparent ut you still wanted it clearer

you were not equating me
didn't mean to call me stupid
careful not to harm but i was right there when you won
i complemented you
brought you where you'd never been
how could you mistreat someone who mistook you for the sun?

I love you
(2.19.22)

People say I love you and I throw it out the door
So I don't know what to say when I mean it anymore
Do I let you in my walls? What if you don't want to break them?
What if you see a flaw? I'd be helpless; I'd be dying

Find someone exciting, find someone who shares your mind
Not even the most perfect girls will satisfy your kind
The world is so much brighter though you imagine it a frown
Now the glass has nothing in it but I'm sure you wrote that down

battleship
(2.21.22)

when my last battleship was sunk
you stood tall with bleeding triumph
the love in your cheeks was fading
and i knew that you weren't faking

When the apocalypse was over
And I thought that we were saved
I ran to you but you were somehow gone
You only came back for the siren

dirt
(2.22.22)

i miss when i woke up and smelled like the night before
like you
like the dirt i swallowed when i tumbled over
like the dirt i inhaled when you lifted me
like the breeze the cold brought on the rooftop
like the hands on my hips in that uncomfoortable car
like our sweet innocence that makes me see stars
i miss when when i woke up and still felt hazy
nothing was right except your words
they kill me
back then leaving out certain things was not accepted
but now all i can say is "what was i expecting?"
i miss when i woke up and smelled like you
everything was alright, i can see
we didn't die
in fact, we're still alive
but i can tell we both know
we're disappearing inside

boxes
(2.23.22)

you stack those boxes
rid me of my appetite
and suffocate me

table
(2.25.22)

you use me as a table
and put your drink on me
my body knows the feeling
as a drop slides down my back
my heart almost snapped
it felt like i was bleeding

you use me as a blanket
a comforter to warm you
never bound to realize
in all your life
you are the player
i am the prize

you use me as a hammer
to fix you when you crack
you failed to tell you
tools break too
they destroy as well and i can already tell
i'll break myself
breaking you

i don't love you
(2.28.22)

I will love you
when the seas refuse to part for your feet
and there is only one boat with one seat
I know I will surrender my heart for yours to beat

I will love you
when the universe tells me I should otherwise
you will never witness a trace of disguise
if that so I will take my own opposite demise

I will love you
when your skin is the deepest royal violet
and not even the greatest kiss can revive it
I know I will spend my days in grief for your silence

I will love you
when you refuse to accept my generous prayer
and leave without thoguhts that i'll no longer be there
I know I will wait patiently for you to appear

I will love you
when there is no hole in the sky and I must travel wide
until the night I finally rest by your side
I will use your light as my only waking guide

withdrawal
(3.01.22)

as i face withdrawal
you are my sweet painkiller
i am addicted

marry
(3.1.22)

marry the person
in my health. in my sickness,
marry the feeling

make love
(3.3.22)

I will make love to your eyes
for they are so beautiful i fear someone will envy

I will make love to your heart
for it is the kind of gold i fear a thief will set his eyes on

I will make love to your soul
for only it is a worthy substitute when the sun dies

I will make love to your words
for they birth a side i was not aware hadn't bled out

I will make love to your time
for there is no clock in this pawn shop that will ever end
and my lack of satisfaction is that of one

vocabulary
(3.3.22)

my vocabulary has expanded since our meeting
it never crossed my mind that the sun was a human being
because you are not the sun
you shine so much brighter than one

you are the music of the world as linen flesh
no one in this room can deny your presence
the walls are mirors but all i see is you
you must know it is foolish to reject what is true

Forgive me, lover
(3.4.22)

Forgive me, lover, for i have sinned
but i will not tolerate your indecency
And you must accpet my honest request;
May no living corpse in the world
dare to [content] you more

Forgive me, lover, for I have sinned
How was I meant to know?
No lasting invitation escapes that mouth
Even Him that I hate could be one with me
No one would suspect a thing

Forgive me, lover, for I have sinned
But have you ever even talked to me?
AND I have been struggling to breathe
for my entire life
the one that only started once i met you

I forgive you, lover, when you sin
because no one ever looked at me like that
Though I cannot hear the fear in your voice,
and everyone says it's bad,
leaving you seems impossible to do
for you are all i've ever had

magic mirror
(3.8.22)

Magic mirror, on the wall,
who is fairest of them all?
Not you; I know this to be true
I'm through with your trick candles
and walls not even God can get to

Who am I, to demand your change?
The habits you display only need rearranged
I crave your love, your breath, your strife
I still would kill to share your life
No one makes me feel as alright

ivy feathered tongue
(3.9.22)

yes, lick into my mouth
with your ivy feathered tongue
the smell of your unfaithfulness
does not reek enough
when you came over
and lied on my bed
it leaked into my pillow
you're contagious

persona
(3.14.22)

O Dear Lord: have I baited you?
Did I cheat the only being that can love me?
The hand went too far down my throat, I'm sure
I choke when I talk to him but our words are so pure
And what is the lesson of this patent transgression?
Hope over all: I can stall our collision
when at that moment I release all the love I've repressed
we create in his bed then he leaves me undressed

you have me wasting my best for this impossible test
my knees are tired and i need to rest
what happened to mercy, my heart and SOUL
I apologize; I do not mean to gift you coal

O Dear Lord; have I forsaken you?
Did I bite the hand trying to save me?
I'm behind, I avow, But he is no guest
No longer I allow this at the frequency he pressed
So only now I wait; his persona to infest.

watch him walk
(3.16.22)

I watch him walk
He keeps his hands in his pockets taking long strides

I watch him eat
He holds his fork like it will grow legs

I watch him talk
He rolls his eyes but he's holding back a smile

I watch him sleep
He doesn't even know how beautiful he looks

I watch him laugh
His lips move in ways only microscopes could notice

I watch him read
His focus is the priceless painting I splurge on

I watch him turn
His fingers slide through his hair like they are meant to be there

I watch him stay
His movement is foreign

darker than coal
(3.21.22)

you were like the stars
and i was the moon
you had kissed my head when i was full
and left craters in me

i could recognize your body anywhere
and all my mirrors can too
i leaned forward and stared
but only saw you

you became a part of me
then we were ripped alone
our blood was darker than coal
i should've known.

throwing up
(3.21.22)

and you didn't hold my hair back
when i was gone and throwing up
but i still followed you into the dark
i should've known at least that much

i am weak for you
so i don't care that you don't show it
but you should care. you should
yet we stay in this death drawn pit

only option
(3.22.22)

i always knew it would come to this
it didn't matter that i love you less
or that you love me more
because i am your only option.

i always knew it would come to this
when you said it would from the start
your mouth, it never opened
but i read your soul through the cracks in your heart

leaving you kills my mind
leaving Him would kill us all
but you went and did them favors
left me hanging like you did my Savior
you had everyone on your side
and i suffered for your behavior
i tried to hold my pride
but was forced to waver

microscope
(3.24
9.17.22)

If you are the germs
on my brand new tennis shoes
I am the microscope
studying your every move

when i think of you
(3.28.22)

when i think of you
i think of your hands
lengths i would go to
to touch
and be touched by you

i think of your charity
what do you want with me?
breaking down when you give me nothing
while you weren't even thinking of me

i think of the case
uncertainty and haste
anfractuously drumming on my heart at your own pace

i think of the beginning
your willingness to speak
when did we last converse?
let's give the future a peek
what do we have here?
someone's heart sank
i am lonely for the first time
and i have you to thank

nature
(3.28.22)

i was supposed to write a poem
about nature and the way it feels
but all i can think of
is how your hair falls down
eyes sparkle in the moon
brightly in the frightened sky
light in the nearby June<

two ears
(3.28.22)

two ears
but he does not listen

words for comforting
but he does not say them.

every breath
spent on you.

when you call-
where does he go?

when you text-
he escapes.

two eyes
what does he see?

he tries
but coddles me

one chance
to make this right

you want him?
i will put up no fight.

miles away
(2022)

from miles away you can smell it
the aching and breaking of my soul
yelling everywhere, my butterflies blue
the warm golden glow, from thinking of you i emit
and i am never not thinking of you

sick sick sick
(2022)

you must be sick
sick
sick in the head
to leave me out to dry
you told me that you missed me
so why do i cry?

hell
(2022)

i don't want to live in hell again
but forever in chains would be worse
don't you want what's best for me?
don't you want to disperse?

the tease
(2022)

so i'll admit, i tease.
not only do you give me butterflies
you send me swarms of bees
it's all the same, i know
but do you understand it yet?
who is the lucky one?
who gets to be the prize?
what is this gut feeling in my chest...

root
(2022)

you're the cause of the root
all the way at the bottom of my heart
And it's dancing around
my
CHAINS
Unlocking
slowly, but tearing it apart.