cough
(5.7.21)

i have to cough.
it's stuck in my throat like words i can't get out.
there's a silence begging to be filled because someone
said something a tad too honest
the frog from my young self's favorite bedtime story
jumped out of book and into my tired mouth.
and i need to sneeze.
it's been held back too long. why should they have to differentiate
between my cough?
yet here it is now, pressing for escape from my lungs
i need to clear my throat.
waiting waiting waiting for it to dissolve, but it doesn't
there's a lead pipe that scarlet red once used to commit crime.
it's in my chest, beating along to my heart as fast as when i look at him.

but i don't want him to notice me.
so i don't cough.
i don't sneeze.
i don't clear my throat.

i don't want to make a scene.